Tiger Beatdown: Hugo Schwyzer wants to jizz on the face of feminism, but not why you’d think

Yep, just what the title says. And here’s the opening paragraph (also, I was angry when I wrote this. And I regret nothing!):

Jizz on your face! A FACIAL! Let your guy cum on your rosy cheeks because it is the latest act of feminist empowerment! Moreover, IT’S CLEANSING! Didn’t you hear? Jizz on your face is better than a detox diet! It has “purifying” properties. Or so says Hugo Schwyzer, Professor Feminism extraordinaire in his latest installment at Jezebel, He Wants to Jizz on Your Face, but Not Why You’d Think:

A female student turned to the guy who’d brought up the topic of semen and validation and asked him, “So you’re saying that when a man comes on a woman’s face, it’s not about making her dirty — it’s about making him feel clean?” The young man blushed, the class tittered. “Yes,” he said, “that’s it. And that’s what makes it so hot.”

Only oh, I forgot to mention, the purifying act is not for you, feminist woman, target audience of Professor Feminism’s column. The cleansing is for him!