It might read like something out of someecards but this feature, courtesy of the aptly named The Ladies’ Monthly, will teach you a fundamental life skill: how to dump your parents in an elderly home in a tasteful manner. Instructions to set up the floral arrangements for their farewell party, sadly not included.

And once you are done getting rid of your parents like a lady, you can head off to their next feature so that you can learn yet another important lesson:

Because, you know, acting like a lady is not enough. You must also smell like one.

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