Yes, Sadie. We get it. You’re so wacky and original. If she’s leaving her apartment I guess we can expect an update on what else she’s scared of.

Stop trying to make your doll happen.

Wrong! The doll should happen. Because I am an amateur art critic, I will assign metaphorical value to Sadie’s doll. Let’s try this game:

A 30 something year old woman interviews a Hollywood star while carrying a large doll dressed in matching outfits. What does this doll say to us? What is this instrument of self expression signifying? A few things:

  • The woman carrying the doll has no self awareness, thus rendering the doll a visual representation of oblivion in media
  • The woman carrying the doll is an immature person stuck in her early teens, thus rendering the doll a symbolic instrument of media’s obsession with youth
  • The woman carrying the doll is such a poorly skilled writer that the doll masks her lack of dominion over words, thus rendering the doll a metaphor of the increasingly shallowness and meaningless depictions of mass media
  • The woman carrying the doll uses a toy in lieu of more politically challenging statements because she practices a new (not yet academically taught!) brand of news reporting called “hipster journalism”, thus, the doll becomes an allegory of new media.

See? It wasn’t that difficult! We need that doll, otherwise how do we spot nonsense at first sight?

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